I’ve been so tired of debt, I’ve been so tired of being on other people’s dime. I put myself here, and I struggle with my autism. As a full time stay-at-home parent who’s on the spectrum, I tend to put the needs of my kid before myself, forget to take care of myself, and I often feel like I’m not enough, even when logic tells me that is the furthest thing from the truth.
I say these things to give you some perspective and hopefully reach those that may have a similar negative outlook on themselves. And for those who aren’t in that boat, maybe it can help you understand someone’s struggle in your own life.
My dream job is to help others while having my needs met and my family’s desires fulfilled. I want everyone around me to be paid back for everything they’ve ever given me, x10. But I really don’t need all that much to be happy. I have my family, I have my friends, I have my community.
What I truly want is for others to live more care-free and to provide for others in waves because that is what I have found brings me joy; not the thanks or the feeling of doing something for someone else, but the genuine successes they have. The fact that I can be a piece in that puzzle helps when I feel lonely or forgotten. It helps me remember that even if others don’t realize it or think about it, there is something that I can carry into their lives that brings them success.
I don’t need recognition; I just want others to be happy and able to live.
Creating for Win The Night has changed my outlook completely.
No matter how tough the days have gotten, no matter how many arguments I have with family because we’re all tense as hell right now, no matter how much time passes, I still find myself at the end of the day thinking, “All I want is for them to be at peace and not have to worry about this.” I used to get depressed about that; it used to be a really hard thing to face. It made me feel powerless.
But now? Now, it brings me this… fuel. It pushes me into a space I’ve never been in before. I’m more focused now than I was years ago. I have more skills and am sharpening old ones. There is hope.
If you feel like you’ll never get there, you will. I promise you, you will. I’m not there yet, but I know that change is here, and I believe in that change for you too. Easier said than done, I know, but if you put in the work you will be there.
Share some encouraging words with others in the comments, and if you aren’t able to, come and reach out for support in the comments. If you see someone say something and there isn’t a reply, reach out in the comments as well.
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